Thursday, 31st October 2013

Deaden weight
Stop the sound from
Echo as repeat

Wait
A little longer, please
Let us listen
Upon our knees we stay in anticipation
Stuck
By thinking too much

"Where is the distraction?"
A distraction of what?
Thought

But movement makes sound
So study the language of action and non

Withered feet, bent soles upward
An isolated room
Open the window and part of you opens your heart also
To possibility. The unthought of
Reins in inspiration, an elephant in the room
"Which room?"
All rooms

All rooms have an elephant in the midst of inspiration
Listen
and act when listening becomes the act

An actor dies intelligent and aware but
Awareness must be killed

Leadened shoes sinking downward
No echoes in the sea
Only water carrying waves to stone
And returning to our ears
Full up of the world but keeping it away

Friday, 11th October 2013

Today I reached a part in R.D. Laing's 'The Divided Self' where literally every line was ringing true to me on so many levels it was like a checklist of my behaviour and emotional states.
I actually feel elated that I can relate to it all because for so long I've been trying to understand why I've always felt so disconnected and split from myself, how my inner world and my outer world rarely ever match up, and why I am so incapable of breaking out of the prison I set myself up in.

I have no answers yet but I feel like a pressure has been slightly lifted off me and that I may have found the first couple of steps to take on the path I've been searching so long for.